After a handful of emails regarding last weeks post and comment threads, and reading through them again, I guess I’ll have to conclude that I tried and failed, but it was worth a shot. I wanted to give one more try to clarify two things: what I was trying to get at in the posts last week and what my current position is.
My intention last week was to try and move beyond dialoging about the specific issue of abortion itself and discuss ways that we could support women in general. Apparently no one seemed interested in having that conversation, no matter what we stipulated about when life begins it still came down to debating specifically abortion. I’ve met loving caring people who value life on both sides of this issue. I’d love to try and help those people find common ground on the many issues surrounding abortion, like working toward reducing the number of unwanted pregnancies, or providing support for teen mothers, or providing more mother-friendly work environments and laws. I think if people from both sides could agree to disagree on the specifics of abortion itself, just beyond that I think we would find a huge amount of common ground that we could all band together to address.
My current position on abortion is not what you might assume it is from my recent posts. I am extremely pro-life (against killing in all circumstances). Yet I’m open to the possibility that not wanting to outlaw abortion does not conflict with that. I’m also willing to listen and consider both sides and question the assumptions that have been given to me about when “life” begins. I don’t think it makes me heartless or callous to be willing to consider other views, nor does it make me any less of a Bible believing Christ follower. Personally, I would never recommend a woman have an abortion, rather I’d provide every viable means of support I can for them to go through with the pregnancy.
This has clearly been one of those hot button issues and I’m disappointed we couldn’t find a way to dialog about the surrounding complexities and find some common ground. I think one thing we all can agree on is that we must work hard to address the injustices that women, particularly mothers, face in our society. And another is that every child in our society should have their basic needs met and cared for regardless of the wealth or abilities of their parents: clothing, shelter, food, education. Let’s work together to meet those ends.
Ariah, I have found over the years that this is a topic so volitale that most times it’s not even worth having the discussion. I so appreciate your take on this and willingness to listen. Your conclusion is right on. Thanks.
Ariah, I will be back to add my two cents when I have some time…baby needs me right now.
Jamie
I think that the reason the debate went in such a direction is because abortion is a sub-question about how to support women through the myriad issues surrounding reproduction. So it’s probably best to approach the question of abortion through the question of supporting women, as opposed to the other way around.
I know you’ve seen this before Ariah, but I’ll repost this for the benefit of those who haven’t seen it.
http://www.webcomicsnation.com/deanrankine/life/series.php
I think Richard hit the nail on the head. Abortion is a really just a symptom of a bigger problem. But I do understand where you’re coming from, Ariah- symptom or not, it still exists, is important, and needs to be addressed. I think it would be wonderful if every pro-life church (or Christian family, for that matter) would begin practicing what they preach so to speak by adopting a young (or otherwise struggling) pregnant woman and walking alongside her through the pregnancy. Support her financially, spiritually, emotionally. Go to prenatals with her, provide counseling or other needed services, hold her hand through the birth if needed. Whatever it takes. If she wants to put her child up for adoption, help her with that. Ya know?? Can you imagine the ramifications of something like that??? I think it would be beautiful. The question is, though, do we truly believe in the sanctity of life?? Enough to make some personal sacrifices to live it out in our homes and places of worship??? Cause until we can provide tangible, loving support like this, all the political Christian crap and protesting clinics and anti-abortion legislation is meaningless and ineffective.
Oh, also wanted to add that the support we provide shouldn’t just stop once she has the baby. It should be a lifetime commitment of love and caring. Treating her the way Jesus would have us treat her. Showing her and her child they matter very much to their Father…that he is madly in love with them and they are not walking through this life alone.
Peace,
Jamie
I don’t think that you made these intentions clear. People were talking about abortion because you started a conversation about abortion. A couple of people did mention the need to support women. We didn’t spend a lot of time going into specifics but I think we might have if that had been asked. Perhaps I’ll come back when I have more time to talk about that.
One other angle to consider, in reference to the stance that one may personally disagree with abortion and would not do it, but that this should not be forced on others: What if that was the attitude toward slavery in the 1800’s? What if ppl that opposed slavery as a moral wrong, and would not own slaves themselves said, “well, it’s wrong for me, but I don’t think it is right to impose my morality on someone else”, or, “well, you have to really leave this decision up to the plantation owners, since they are in the unique position of needing a great deal of cheap labor, and us city folks just can’t understand that, and so we should stay out of the debate.” Sound familiar?
What those types of arguments ignore is the rights and interests of the victim. In the case of slavery – the slave, and in the case of abortion – the unborn child.
I think if you argue that this matter should be left up to the individual conscience of the mother to decide if she wants to have a child or not (once she has gone through the process to become pregnant in the first place, as in most cases), then you can make the same argument for killing an infant or toddler that the mother can’t or does not want to care for. What’s the difference? This is not a matter of disrespecting women in any way, rather it is a matter of protecting the ultimate “innocents”.
BTW, yes Christians should stand in the gap and support mothers in trouble in every way possible, but getting that done perfectly in every instance should not be a prerequisite to opposing the killing of a child.
Brave dialogue! Like most Americans I am pro-choice and have no interest in debating those views here. However, I do like your call for common ground – things we can work together on to prevent the need for abortion. All sides should be able to agree on preventing unintended pregnancies.
Here are some things I think we could do together:
We need to make sure every child in public schools has access to comprehensive, age-appropriate sex education. Conflicts with your religious beliefs? Send your kids to a religious school.
We need to make sure insurance companies are covering birth control prescriptions (oftentimes they don’t).
We need to pressure pharmacies to keep condoms in front of the counter, for many youth won’t buy them otherwise.
We need to stop granting celebrity to teen mothers in the news media – that’s sending unrealistic messages to younger girls that they might be able to manage a teen pregnancy.
We need to stop sexualizing kids in popular culture.