All posts by ariah

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Time Machine: Wheaton College article about the FMA

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(In the fall of 2004 at Wheaton College, where I was a senior, a couple of students from the Student Government were trying to approve an official statement from the Wheaton College Student Body declearing a stance in support of the Federal Marriage Amendment that would outlaw homosexual marriage. A number of students rose up in opposition to the attempt to approve the statement. I’m ever grateful to Lola, the Student body president at the time, for if she had not vetoed the initial vote on the statement it would have been sent out and made regardless of others input. Anyways, here is my article for the Wheaton College school newspaper concerning the topic)

How do we truly love our neighbor? If I may contextualize a bit: Jesus says do as the homosexual prostitute did when he, not judging or condemning, had compassion and cared for the needs of the Wheaton student who had been left for dead in the alley outside of the ministry she worked at, even after another Wheaton student and a pastor drove by. (LUKE 10:30-37).
Some in our community feel that loving your neighbor is best done by supporting the Federal Marriage Amendment, I’m fearful of that action. I am neither the person, nor a Record article the place to sway your decision on the Federal Marriage Amendment. I will say that we must be very clear that the FMA is NOT a stand against homosexuality as sin, but a political statement concerning the rights of those already practicing homosexuality. My words here are only to voice a concern over the message that Student Government and the Wheaton College student body will send to the world if we COLLECTIVELY support this amendment. This is not a definitive statement, only a few thoughts.
Jesus’ public condemnations where almost always directed to the Religious authorities within the religious community that he was a part of. In the early church we see most rebuking and moral standards being dealt with within the church, not to non-Christians. Paul even says, “What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church?” (I Cor. 5:12)
This FMA Statement will define our community for years to come, especially if the news world catches wind of it. When we go to do ministries the question will not be about whether we are allowed to dance, but why do we dislike homosexuals so much?
How did Jesus address the idea of using physical punishment to uphold morality? He said, “He who is without sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone.” (Jn. 8:7) We are not to use the law as a means to force adherence to our moral standards. You want to love your neighbor who is a homosexual? Go hang out with them, be with them. Work with Emmaus ministries on CSC (Christian Service Council), sit at the bedside of someone dying of AIDs whose family has disowned him or her. That is where you can share Christ love.
Before we try and take the speck out of others eyes (and I think by “brothers” Jesus meant other believers), have we made sure there is not a plank in our own? I’m not sure exactly how we go about doing that but I have some ideas of statements that we could make to the greater community that would at least be a step in that direction.
I have two suggestions for possible proposals and resolutions that I think we can as a college campus collectively pass and send to every major organization that is fighting for gay rights. First as it relates to the support of marriage. I think we can be humble and admit that Christians have not been a very good example of the sanctity of marriage. We can let the world know that we know that we too are sinners and fail to live up to God’s ideals. We can explain to others that God is and will forever be the one who has defined marriage, and no matter what we the church or the rest of the world does we cannot change that. And we can commit to being an example in years to come of what true marriage is, as a union before God.
The second statement I think we can make, relates to the homosexual people who this impacts. We, the church, have been a horrible example of Christ love to the homosexual community for years. Christ would have sat by the bedside of dying homosexuals in the height of AIDs in this country, yet we stood outside with signs saying they would burn in hell (or we passively stood by while those statements where made). We can beg forgiveness from the homosexual community for the hurt and hatred that has been dealt to them by members of the Christian community. We can commit to spending much more time personally showing and spreading the love of Christ in genuine ways to people who practice homosexuality.
Unity in the body of Christ is an absolute priority in scripture and should be on this campus. How do we bring that unity amidst such differences on an issue like the FMA, which is not a simple Biblical issue? Shall we divide our community by making collective statements that misrepresent those in our community? I pray not. Let us dialogue together and pray together. “And if on some point you think differently, that too God will make clear to you. Only let us live up to what we have already attained.” (Phil 3:15-16)
If you believe it is best and most loving to support the FMA, then I pray you are doing equally as much to assure the that gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender persons know the love of Christ. Please don’t make a statement supporting the FMA on my behalf. To those who support the FMA, please feel free to collect 1800 signatures of students who support the FMA, but please don’t outcast me from the community by making collective statements. How will I remain in this community? How will I tell my homosexual friend that I chose to remain a part of a community that was making collective statements that to her carry such hate? Lord help me.

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Killing Us Softly: A look at Sexist Media (a MUST watch)

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Note: This is a 35 minute video about the media’s portrayal of women. It’s a very important and interesting film that you should take the time to watch. I don’t think it needs much further commenting, only that I would strongly recommend that you watch it.
Note: Keep in mind that this is about the dehumanizing and objectifying way the media portrays women, so it shows plenty of examples of that, proceed with caution.

Update: Media Education Foundation is now on youtube
I still found the full video on Google Videos.

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Ode to My Father

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Today, September 21st, marks half a century of life for my dad. It seems an appropriate time for me to provide a toast, an ode, a speech acknowledging the greatness of this man.

It’s sad that it takes most of us growing up and moving out of the house before we realize just how significant our parent’s have been in our lives. For me, working daily with a lot of youth who have not had a father in their lives, I’m continually in awe of how blessed I am to have had a father in my life.
I’ll start by saying my dad was not perfect. It was the imperfection that I would focus on at times growing up and is usually the ammo for worthless childhood arguments that have no real impact on except later regret at how mean I was to my parent’s at times.
I look back now and I see how beneficial and important it was for me to see my dad’s imperfections. It taught me that it’s okay to not have it all together, that even grown-ups are learning and growing, and even grown-ups need to say their sorry sometimes. It’s taught me that being real and honest with one another is much more important then having a surfacy, fake, polite relationship. I know the lesson that it is okay to make mistakes is something a lot of people never learned, and they daily confront overwhelming stress because of it.
I remember two classes in high school that I almost failed, Freshman year Spanish and Junior year Economics. Junior year was a tough year for me and I was really upset about how hard Economics was and how I was barely passing. My dad simply came by my side and encouraged me that it was okay if I failed the class, that if I gave it my best effort that was what was important. I never felt my school work was about grades, it was about whether I was trying and learning, and it was okay if I made mistakes, at least I tried.

My dad taught me the importance of standing on your own two feet and paving a way for yourself. When I was in high school he ran a temporary employment service. Because of that connection I did a ton of odd jobs for pretty good pay, sweeping at construction sites, bundling newspapers, flipping carpets, supervising a bouncy castle, and many more. I think it was the summer before my junior year of high school, my dad told me I need to go out on my own and get a job myself. We got into a big argument about it, I couldn’t see the point, and honestly I was deathly afraid of venturing out on my own. After a few more yelling matches and tears I finally gave in, dressed up, typed up a resume and stepped out. I walked out of my house and down the street, completely on my own and I got my first real job. I didn’t realize it then, but that was an extremely powerful experience for me. It took my dad pushing me out of the nest before I ever learned I could fly.

If I could pin point it, I would say the beginning of my spiritual growth was at Promise Keepers 1996 in Chicago. I had just finished 8th grade and I went with my dad, and another father and son, friends of ours. Before that I’d never thought of church or Christianity as anything more then an event we attended on Sunday. I can’t remember any of the speakers or anything, but I remember the event, because it was the first time I’d ever heard the things I did. Here I was with my Dad learning and intentional pursuing how to follow after God. The speakers talked about Loving your spouse, loving your kids, pursuing reconcialition with one another, being humble and serving, and here was my Dad spending his time, energy and money to do this and to bring me along as well! There was a lesson on intentionality that I will never forget. I realized that day that if I wanted to grow and change and become a better person, that it was something I had to work at. Books, sermons, a Bible, they all took on a whole new meaning to me. If I wanted to do anything in life I could (my mom taught me that one), but it would take work. Loving your parents, loving your spouse, your kids, your neighbor, God, it wasn’t just something that happened, it was something you worked at. And now I’m learning how to love my dad, the way he’s been learning how to love me for 24 years.

My dad has always been there for me. He’s taught me that family and relationships are more important then jobs, money, possessions. My dad has changed jobs a bit, and I know that many times it has been because his family is more important then any pursuit of success. My dad helped coach my soccer team when I was in elementary school (he still has the 15 year old sweatshirt to prove it), he came to my high school soccer games at 3 in the afternoon and my track meets even when I was continually dead last in the hurdles. My dad’s work schedule never got in the way of being with the family. He was there when I had knee surgery on a Wednesday morning and hanging out or picking us up when we got out early on a week day.

I could go on and on, but I realize this is getting longer then I anticipated. It would take me 50 years to write about all the ways my dad has influenced my life.
I love my dad. I know how blessed I am, because a lot of people have not had a father like mine, it is something I won’t take for granted.

Thank you Dad, I love you, and Happy Birthday.

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Too much in my head!

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Wow, I’ve really been neglecting my writing. The crazy thing about it for me is that I recognize how important and theraputic and helpful it is for me to write. I’ve had all these ideas and thoughts inside my head and I haven’t taken the time to write many of them down. I like putting them on the blog because it encourages me to think further about them.
Sometimes I forget about things I wanted to write, other times, like now, they bang around in my head for weeks till I finally sit down and punch them out. These might be short post here, but hopefully I can get my thoughts out well either way. I know your not interested in a post like this anyways.

P.S. More podcast to follow.

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Did you miss me? I learned a little something.

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Sorry for the delay in posting, I neglected to tell you that I was out at a work conference. For those who are interested, here’s some links to some of the stuff I learned about…

The Uhlich Voices, from UCAN, tore up the stage in St. Louis.

Strategies for Empowered Living’s speaker Cassandra Mack was incredible, I learned a lot from her.

Jaiya John was another great speaker. His heart and attitude really connected with the kids.

There where some other speakers and events too, but I can’t find any links for those.

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9/11 – How did it shape you?

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9/11/06 is a memorable day for many. Anyone who has the access to technology that would allow them to read this blog probably knows exactly where they were on that day.

Regardless of your thoughts now, perspectives on the war, politics, etc. There is no denying that 9/11/06 had a major effect on many of our lives, our way of thinking, the issues we thought through, etc.

I want to make this an open thread for readers to share briefly how 9/11 shaped them, but to encourage that I’ll start with a brief thought.

Before 9/11 I honestly couldn’t tell you the difference between a Democrat and a Republican (I knew they were different, just didn’t know who supported what). 9/11 caused me to think about my views on politics, war, evil and terrorism.

So, now it’s your turn:

How did 9/11/06 Shape you?

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TerraPass and a mission to reduce my emissions

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(Writing that title suddenly reminded me I have to get our yearly emissions test done)

I just bought a TerraPass.


I wanted to wait till the end of this year to calculate how much gas we used and calculate how much CO2 we’ve emitted.
Our nice little Honda gave us an average of 43mpg over 9,600 miles this year.
That calculates to:

Fuel use:
223 gallons per year

Emissions:
4,363 lbs CO2 per year

A TerraPass is basically a donation to fund clean energy initiatives in the amount that offsets the amount of emissions our car produced.

From TerraPass:

How does TerraPass work?

A Road TerraPass is a decal you place on your car showing that you have sponsored a clean energy project that balances out the environmental impact of your driving.

TerraPass funds clean energy from sources like wind farms, methane capture facilities, and more.

By replacing energy from fossil fuels with clean energy, TerraPass reduces carbon dioxide emissions. These reductions balance the emissions from your car.

TerraPass is audited by the non-profit Center for Resource Solutions to verify the impact of our clean energy investments.

Now, getting a TerraPass doesn’t mean I can just drive around where ever we want to. Mindy and I discussed the goal of reducing the amount of miles we drive over the course of the year as well.
It’s surprising that we drove 9600 miles this year, which averages to nearly 26 miles a day. The large amount of those miles come from trips home to visit family, but it ends up adding up. I’d love to reduce our driving by 20%, but that might end up being too ambitious. That would be 7680 miles or 640 miles a month. We’ll see what happens.

For those in big cities I’d strongly recommend looking into Car Sharing Programs.

P.S. I’m not sharing all this with you cause I’m “into it” or cause “it’s my thing.” I’m sharing it because I’ve recognized that my lifestyle is unsustainable and is thus not being a faithful steward of God’s green earth. I just want to share with you how I’m trying to do that.